Have you ever noticed how people’s words come into your mind at weird times?
Today the words and actions of someone from years ago entered my mind. In the situation, this person introduced everyone else by their name and job or qualification. When it came to my introduction, I was “just a mother of four”. I was so annoyed. But instead of letting it get to me, I decided to accept that is their perception of me. That changed my perception of them to the reality of the situation.
I absolutely felt disrespected and disheartened. Every so often, they come back to me with a reality check. The problem with that is how this repeat memory is processed depends on where I’m at emotionally and mentally.
When I was unwell, these words would hurt badly. I would end up angry and upset because I suppose they reinforced a message I didn’t like. Without the right qualifications or job, I was a nobody. So when a situation with the same inference happened, it bit into my insecurities and made them worse. Other people’s words are not law, right or important. It is us who give power to these people’s words.
If you have someone’s words on repeat, take some time out to be realistic about their perception of the world. Who are they really, and what are their motivations for saying the things they say?
Their words do not need to become your truth. You can choose what you believe about yourself based on real evidence. You can choose to keep the power. We are our own worst critics, but we can be our best cheerleader when we change our self perception.