Relationships are not always easy

There are ups, there are downs and there are curve balls that can affect the relationship. Relationships take work, determination and commitment from both parties to work

The more you put in, the more you’ll get back.

A relationship is an investment that will build as you devote your time and effort. As well as commitment, relationships require both parties to be open to adapt and change throughout life.  Relationship problems can occur in all aspects of life - families, romantic partners, at work or at school. Communication and emotional mindfulness are at the heart of healthy relationships, these skills can be learned and can even help to repair some unhealthy relationships.  

Learn skills and tools that promote happy, equal and loving relationships.

Together we will eradicate self blame,  but take accountability for our actions.  Learn to understand and recognise when thoughts and behaviours are causing additional problems,  and explore new healthy behaviours, thoughts and actions. I will help you set boundaries and learn to say ‘No’ without the guilt and stress it can cause.

Taking steps to improve relationships

You may feel that your friendships and family relationships are also unhealthy and that you would like to make changes to those relationships. These changes come from within. People will only do to us what we allow them to do to us. 

Relationships and Boundaries

The focus of the programme is on discovering what you have been through and helping you understand where you are and why you are feeling the way you are. We look at emotions, thoughts and behaviours. Its a process of understanding what's happened in your life, to cause the emotional impact that it has.

Relationships, whether intimate, parental, familial or friendships are often difficult when you have anxiety and / or depression.  Communication is affected, emotions are irrational and you may be sensitive to being emotionally hurt by others therefore you may have withdrawn or you spend exhausting amounts of time in the company of others pretending to be ok.

What you are unable to do is emotionally connect with others as your emotional connection with yourself is disrupted by the irrational emotions and thoughts, the internal feeling of worthlessness.  This irrational way of life interferes with your ability to assess the appropriateness of relationships, your behaviour and you are unable to make good decisions about these people. You are unable to set clear boundaries, partly because you haven’t learned how to.

Take control of the relationships in your life today

If your relationship leaves you feeling unsatisfied or is on the rocks, I can help you take steps to repair trust and rebuild a satisfying and meaningful, loving relationship.

 

Your Emotional Vessel

I work on the idea that we all have an emotional vessel - where we store our emotional reactions, so over time we fill this vessel up.

When our vessel is approaching being full, we release these emotions unconsciously so we can prepare for tomorrow’s stresses and strains.

Looking at emotions in this way, we can imagine the vessel to be similar to a bottle of carbonated water. If shook up, the top pops off and we have a overflow that we can’t manage.

If we release the cap slightly, small bubbles can escape without danger or damage. Finding healthy ways to release that pressure is the aim of the coaching programme.

Superhero Complex

Superhero Complex

I'm Hayley and I have a super hero complex. A super hero complex is the uncontrollable urge to help, support, bend over backwards to save them. You take responsibility for other people's lives, emotions and decisions, fighting to make them happy daily. Fighting to...

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What will take us ‘over the edge’?

Can we predict the things that will take us ‘over the edge’? Busy week last week; in a positive way mostly but then a few hurdles towards the end. I had a surge of energy brought on by excitement of some new developments, running around like a headless chicken...

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Superhero Complex

Superhero Complex

I'm Hayley and I have a super hero complex. A super hero complex is the uncontrollable urge to help, support, bend over backwards to save them. You take responsibility for other people's lives, emotions and decisions, fighting to make them happy daily. Fighting to...

read more

Why coaching isn’t a quick fix

We are taught to work hard at school, work, sports, etc but no one tells us how important it is to work hard on ourselves. So many clients think initially that my programme is a quick fix - six sessions plus the introduction, and quite often they think that the end of...

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Knowing who we are

Our focus on learning, formed when we are children, is often centered on academic subjects - maths, english science. All valuable knowledge for the workplace, but outside of that, so is learning about ourselves. Knowing who we are, what we like, what we want from...

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Finally opening up

This lady was amazing in her journey and met her challenges face on, even when it got tough. "Looking back now I don’t even recognise the person I was before meeting Hayley. I was broken with no hope of things getting better and began to accept that that was my life....

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Coaching workshop feedback

My first workshop about implementing coaching and training in the workplace on behalf of the local college went really well. In the short workshop, we talked about the difficulties of clear definitions of coaching and training, when coaching or training is the...

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Be kind, be mindful, be aware

I am having a few internal arguments about a particular situation which is time limited. My stubborn side says forget it, walk away - the other side of stubborn says no do it, you never give up, show those people you can do it. My sensitive side is sitting in blame...

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Stepping out of the ‘comfort zone’

When you are wanting to make any kind of change to your life, your success will depend on how much you can put into the changes too. But when you have mental health struggles, it can be really difficult. It's like putting someone at the bottom of Everest and saying,...

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Gratitude

Gratitude

£5, might buy you lunch, snacks... maybe even an item of clothing for those of you who are bargain hunters. How we feel about £5 is dependent on a few variables. For example1. In your bank / wallet or purse, you have £20 spare cash after paying bills. You fancy lunch...

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Reviews of the coaching programme

I asked clients who have been through the face to face programme with me to give me comparison feedback and this is what they said: "Morning Hayley. I've gone through the programme and it's wonderful. Refreshed me lots. It's very honest and from the heart. This will...

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Heart happiness versus head happiness

Heart happiness versus head happiness

When the need took me, I went travelling, I worked abroad or moved jobs. I had great friends, a vibrant social life and I loved working with children wherever I was in the world. My life has always been pretty good, I had enjoyable experiences, I considered myself to...

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